The Hopeful Perspective
Welcome to "The Hopeful Perspective" a podcast discussing what it entails to transform from a personal position of suffering, pain, loss and HOPELESSNESS toward a renewed perspective of security, perseverance, love and HOPE. I am your host, Jason Hopkins, a long time victim and survivor who has personally been impacted by the Lord to be a victor and a thriver! In each podcast episode you can expect to find authentic dialog from a Biblical and experiential perspective—that is, BEYOND mere religious anecdotes and simple academic exercise—though all used together engage how to find the HOPE that is essential in moving from a victim to victory. Survivor to thriver. Hopeless to hopeful.
Please download, share, subscribe and stay tuned for this journey with me. Leave a review to support and spread awareness for the Hopeful Perspective. As a man who has lived, studied and who truly understands the definition of not only 'surviving' trauma, but authentically thriving as a renewed creation amidst a broken and hurting world, I am humbled to share this platform with you. Prepare to be a critical thinker, a passionate responder and ultimately to be inspired towards The Hopeful Perspective. I would be honored to eventually earn your trust, and welcome you as a part of the 'Hopeful' family.
The Hopeful Perspective
From Loss to Life to Legacy Through Lord Jesus
Have you experienced great loss, to the point where you found yourself dwelling? Have you ever felt overwhelmed in life to the extent you resorted to something to deal with the pain you never expected you would? Have you ever questioned yourself as a parent, even comparing yourself with others despite you KNOWING the truth? Are you one who has dealt with past trauma, and are STILL dealing with some of its effects (PTSD, etc) today? Do you have anxiety bordering on fear with how this will affect your children when they are older? Have you pondered the legacy you are going to leave your children, and wonder if you have anything of value to leave them at all?
Today, we will explore many of these questions as I open up about the healing power of faith and how it has shaped my life and podcasting journey. From facing feelings of inadequacy to believing deep seeded lies of the enemy, this episode is a raw and honest conversation about the transformative power of spirituality and emotional restoration.
In the latter half, I reflect on the necessity of leaving behind a legacy of faith for our children, especially when personal history is marred by trauma. Through these trials, my faith in Christ has been the cornerstone of a redeemed and powerful narrative, one that I strive to pass on to my children. Don’t miss this inspiring and reflective episode designed to uplift and equip you with a hopeful perspective.
Are you inspired by what you hear today? Jason deeply appreciates his listeners taking their time to listening, downloading, and sharing The Hopeful Perspective Podcast. Please help me spread 'hope' to others by writing a review for the podcast making it reachable for all who need to be inspired, encouraged, and changed by hoping once again. Further, understand that downloading the podcast is a surefire way to help increase the algorithm thus the reach of The Hopeful Perspective, even if you delete the episode after listening so as to not affect your data storage. I have also provided a (Support the Show) link DIRECTLY ABOVE THIS PARAGRAPH to click on for those who have shared with me they are "all in" and feel called to financially support the mission and vision of The Hopeful Perspective. A special thank you to those who have made this humble step to financially support the podcast. Without you, there is no US!
Jason Hopkins can also be reached on Facebook as well as Instagram and Threads (jayhop9953). You can also follow 'The Hopeful Perspective' FB page; where you can find more information as well as learn about upcoming news and episodes on the The Hopeful Perspective Podcast.
Welcome to the Hopeful Perspective Podcast. I am your host, jason Hopkins. This podcast is designed to give you a perspective of hope that impacts your life in an authentic and tangible way. I have even utilized six episodes of the podcast to share my life story, which illustrates God's glory through my own experiences overcoming child abuse and trauma, 26 foster homes and institutions, various diagnoses affecting me throughout my life and an eventual brain tumor resulting in multiple brain surgeries on my brain stem. I have moved from merely being a surviving former victim to a faithful and godly, thriving victor who is moving to help others discover hope. Though my past was full of pain and suffering, I have been restored with purpose and sanctification. I have been redeemed. I have also been called to follow Christ in my redemption, and I now want to help you, too, to have a biblical and hopeful perspective as you approach different situations in your own life, from the delightful to the difficult and everything in between. I want to take a moment to thank you for listening and, if you have done so, taking the time to download our episodes, as when you download, along with rating our podcast with an honest response, you help the algorithm immensely to spread our reach. That said, our stats indicate that, while thousands listened and streamed the Hopeful Perspective, less than 10% actually download our episodes. Please consider helping to bridge the gap, to broaden that reach for us. In that reach for us, we have also provided a few options to either contact our show with your direct feedback, as well as to support the podcast financially. If you are called to partner with us in bringing hope to a hurting world, just click the embedded links found on any episode you are downloading on your podcast platform. This is the first upload in a couple of weeks, as I had my first break since I began recording for the Hopeful Perspective podcast.
Speaker 1:I will get into the what and why I decided this was the time for a break a bit later, but prior to the hiatus, we were in a series entitled Jar of Clay, based on the book Living from the Heart Jesus Gave you, one that has deeply impacted my personal journey as a broken jar of clay living with the trauma that formed dissociative identity disorder within me. As I have stated before, I strongly urge you to grab the book Living from the Heart Jesus Gave you, written by Wilder, friesen, kopke, berling and Poole, if you want to learn more about trusting him with your past wounds so you, too, can move into your future promises. Though it is a quick read, it is a treasure chest full of biblical nuggets for anyone who needs to move from past grief to future glory in Christ. I have already heard from a few of you who have not only been impacted by the series but have been moved to get the book, and this warms my heart that a tool that helped bring me hope can be forwarded to do the same for you. Today, though, if you would grant me the grace and trust me with the discernment to do so, we are going to break from the series as I do a special episode that was birthed out of the time. I spent the last couple of weeks praying and emptying myself physically and spiritually. Before we get started today, I want to compel you to grab your favorite snack, hot or cold beverage, get comfortable and come on this journey with me, as we get up close and personal, and I share some things the Lord has put on my heart regarding loss, life and legacy.
Speaker 1:I am 17 episodes into this podcasting journey and I cannot believe we're this deep into it, and I'm finding that I'm yearning to learn as much about how to be a podcaster almost as much as I desire that you are learning about hope as my listeners as much as I desire that you are learning about hope as my listeners and as any one of us who does anything long enough. I know I am learning through my mistakes as effectively as I am through my own successes. You see, listening back through my podcasts, there have been times where I felt the episodes ran a little long or were too heavy in content, and so I adjusted accordingly. A little long or were too heavy in content, and so I adjusted accordingly. I then have felt that at times, certain episodes listening back ran too short or stopped too suddenly. Like anyone else, I have critiqued the sound of my own voice or have been frustrated at my cadence. If you've been listening all the way through, you know that, due to my traumatic brain injury, I need to have notes and essentially have to read my episode, notes that I've created for the sake of quality content, and this has frustrated me with how this can come off versus a lively conversational tone.
Speaker 1:All of this to say, there have been certain guidelines or goals that I've tried to use along the way. First, I want this podcast to be biblical and hermeneutically accurate as a hearer of the word, yet equally practical and applicable to your life as a doer of the word. Second, I want you, as the listener, to walk away from each podcast with the hope of the hope giver. If I have not accomplished one or both of these two elements, then I am not fulfilling the mission and vision of the hopeful perspective. This is not to say that episodes defined outside these criteria cannot be graded as quality content, or even as godly or even biblical. It's just that they are not fitting within the specific mission that I have. But why am I telling you all of this? Well, first, I've always had an eye, ear and a heart for accountability, even to an extreme where I can be hypercritical of myself. Second, I have found that it is important to be accountable to the people that I've been called to serve, and in this case I feel called to serve you, my listeners.
Speaker 1:And when you add up all the elements, I was becoming increasingly self-aware of something else. Whereas the first 14 or so weeks I was full of joy and looking forward to creating and recording episodes for the podcast, the last few I had began to feel a heavy burden, as though I perhaps wasn't in fact good enough because of my brain injury, because of my consistencies and I knew I needed to take a break to empty myself before the Lord and to renew my spirit and the reason that I had felt Paul to the podcast in the first place. I had no idea the direction I was headed, nor the journey the Holy Spirit was going to take me on in order to get there. You see, to be honest and vulnerable, the enemy was triggering me where I have been vulnerable my entire life, where I have lived with what could be called as the orphan spirit, where I can struggle with a lie that I am not loved nor good enough and my value is tied to my performance. For some reason, my mishaps or perceived mistakes with the podcasts turned toward my mind. Messing with these lies and feeling further discouragement. I began toward a downward spiral, one that was prone to trigger my central pain syndrome on the right side of my body, which was a whole red-hot mess. I began to experience an intense flare-up that increased in intensity by the day.
Speaker 1:Then came September, the 10th Suicide Awareness Day. Initially, I thought little about the date itself until I had my first body memory with PTSD and then my first flashback, which was the phone call, the dreaded day the coroner called me about my mother. I will never forget the feelings I had felt that day as I processed the reality that the woman who gave me life, albeit a difficult one, had now found her way to death. I had asked the coroner how she had passed, and I learned that she had overdosed the likes which is typically found in either drug addicts or suicide attempts though they could not be for certain which was her cause. I can recall the mixture of emotions and grief I was met with that day and for the weeks to come I had, only months before my mother's passing, been with her in person and I had felt the Lord press upon me to forgive her for the trauma and the abuse that I was inflicted with as a child. And now she was just gone. I think in some way there was this idealistic portion of me that always hoped my children could experience their grandmother in a redemptive light that I was unable to see as a child myself, and this was not to be the case. The hopeful part of me wished I had the chance to lead her in a prayer to receive the love and forgiveness of Christ in her heart before she left us. But I was never given that chance and I am uncertain if she knew the Lord and Savior at her death.
Speaker 1:You see, the National Day of Suicide is extremely personal for me, not just for the story of my mother, but also because I've had good friends who lost hope and, in their pain and desperation, felt like taking their lives was their only option to end their pain. And this day is triggering for me as I myself have made a number of attempts on my own life as the pain became more than I could bear along the way. And the memory of my mother also triggered a memory that I had in the ICU during my last suicide attempt. I can recall awakening to tubes coming from various orifices of my body, as one can only imagine, and I was still groggy as the many drugs and alcohol I had overdosed on was still within my system. I recall seeing some of my friends who were close to me during that season surrounding my hospital bed. Most clearly I recall the deep pain and shame I awoke feeling with. I remember wanting to escape this feeling, which was exactly what led me to attempting to overdose and die in the first place. I was in the middle of dealing with personal trauma from my childhood and the various protective personalities within my dissociative identity disorder, and I didn't want to hurt any longer. I didn't want to hurt my wife anymore. I didn't want to risk hurting my younger children anymore.
Speaker 1:Suicide is about not seeing any other option to ease the pain and feeling stuck between a rock and a hard place. And I will tell you, having chosen this route a few times and a few times having failed, that you face the aftermath of the guilt and the shame having to deal with, as well as the trauma that has been inflicted upon your loved ones. So here I am on a September, the 10th of this year, experiencing a flare-up, having a flashback of the morgue calling me about my mother, a flashback of my last time in the ICU having attempting suicide. And then I am triggered back to my last time in the ICU at all, having completed brain surgery for the second time and now being treated for meningitis and staphylococcus. My life would never be the same after this, and little did I know to what extent that my personality, my profession of which I would have to retire my ministry, my family, friendships and anything else would be forever changed, and so I would have flashbacks to the very moment before I would go under the anesthesia for the surgery, as this was the last time that I would ever be my old self.
Speaker 1:For years, following my surgery, I had to relearn how to walk, to talk, to grieve, to accept and to grasp the new me that you are listening to today and now. For whatever reason, I couldn't understand why, on this particular day, september 10th, I was flashing back here again. And then it hit me, or rather, the Lord revealed to me what I was most fearful of over everything else. Worse than the daily pain I experienced, the lack of physical or mental stamina I once possessed, or the change in personal relationships, what I feared most of all is the legacy that I would not or could not leave my children. You see, it hit me the night before as I was watching my wife peacefully sleep.
Speaker 1:I have pondered my own mortality, having faced death storm many times before and feeling like my time clock is now moving faster than most people's. Now, this question was at the root of my greatest fear what would I leave my children if I were to go, having been a pastor who is now retired it was never intended to be monetary, as money was never a priority that we taught nor believed as a key principle guiding our lives. As a father, sharing my faith with them is of primary significance. Scripture declares that we ought to train our children in the way they go and when they're older they will not part from it. To be honest and vulnerable, my kids have faced their own set of traumatic circumstances that I pray haven't circumvented their faith nor have nullified the credibility of the patriarch of their family teaching and leading them. Though I have often feared that my having DID definitely created some fearful and traumatic moments. Though my wife and I are both amazed and have given great praise to the Lord for the ways in which my children were protected.
Speaker 1:Yet then having serious brain surgery, not once but twice, resulted in severe changes, created inconsistencies and shifts within my own abilities to help, lead and to guide them as I once could, and so I hope as listeners you can hear and understand the depth of my cry, even if you do not get the full rationale or the extent of it. I am at a loss, or at least battling fears and, at worst, lies of the enemy, that I am not leaving behind a legacy for my children that they can carry on Until I thought of my father, who was found murdered in a river when I was 14 years old, and you just heard the story of my mother. My mother had me as a teen mom who became an addict and battled mental illness her entire life, dying on the streets in this state. My father's fate wasn't much better, and it was here where the Lord brought to me what it was that he was leaving behind for my children. I have never blamed my parents one day for anything that has happened to me, nor made an excuse for it.
Speaker 1:I have strived to be the best version of me, the most healed and restored version, and the Lord adopted me as his own son once my parents could no longer care for me. You see, jesus began writing a new story with my life and the Hopkins family, and one that was full of redemption. And in order for that power to be perfected and made powerful, there had to be deep pain. As I sought restoration and therapy, jesus' light was shining through this beautiful and broken jar of clay. When I was married to a beautiful and faithful, bright, shining light in my wife, a new chapter in the family was being written and a family was born.
Speaker 1:My children were the beginning of the next generation that was born for new things and therefore the generational curses that I was born under needed to be broken. And my children would be free and be born under their safe and warm covering of a household that truly loved them. They would have parents that could stay together despite the hardships that were faced and there were several hardships and severe hardships but the Lord kept them and he was with them. And since the Lord was with us, he is with my children, and that is the legacy that I am given my kids. They shall have the Lord as their father. They shall choose to follow him or not to follow him. They will have the ability to look to our heavenly father during their hardships, their dark times and the moments they think they too cannot carry on any longer.
Speaker 1:You see, I have been so fearful that my value is tied to my own performance that I had forgotten that my value is in Christ, and he has already done it. My legacy is in Him, so therefore it is that of my children's. My hope is in Him, and so is the hope of my kids. Jesus gave me life, and now I have life to the full. Jesus gave me hope and now I can share that hope with others. And Jesus has given my life meaning a legacy that I can pass down for generations to my children and their children and so on, and that comes from love, life and legacy. And that is so. The Lord, our God.
Speaker 1:And maybe some of you are listening and you have never made a decision to follow Jesus Christ as your Lord and your Savior before today. Perhaps you are sensing the Spirit moving you toward Him, and I would be remissed if we left our time today without providing that opportunity for you to respond, and I want to pray for you right now. So all of you listening either agree with this prayer or lift those up in intercession right now. Lord Jesus, I repent of my sins and I surrender my life to you. Wash me and cleanse me from all unforgiveness and pride. I believe that you are the Son of God, that you died on the cross for the forgiveness of my sins and you rose again on the third day for my victory. I believe that in my heart and I make confession with my mouth that you, jesus, are my Lord and my Savior and that your kingdom is indeed forever.
Speaker 1:I want to live my life according to your terms and I want you to change my reliance for myself and any earthly vessels that I have placed my hope, and instead I want to trust your plan and ask for you to put the people and the processes and the models to pursue restoration into my life. I ask for you to reveal to me where I have neglected the needs of those who are broken around me, where I've become indifferent, incapable or have been unable to unprioritize those that need to feel the hope of Christ. Thank you for being a God of mercy, a God of healing and a God of truth, a God of hope. Might I become a beacon of hope to the hurting. May I be one who shows and shares eternal life to those on their way to spiritual death. Show me your ways, lord. Give us the spiritual eyes to see on earth as it is in heaven, and may our priorities begin to reflect your heart and your kingdom, for it's in your name, jesus, christ of Nazareth, that I pray Amen.
Speaker 1:If you have today agreed with this prayer from the depths of your heart, then I welcome you to the eternal family of God and I commend you in your return to your faith, if that is what you've chosen to do today. I want to encourage you to find a church faith family who worships the Lord passionately, is committed to the teaching and preaching of the scriptures, and one that is committed to serving the community and beyond. Also, devote yourself to the reading of scriptures, as there is much to grow, to learn and to be discipled in as it pertains to new life and maturity in Christ. The Lord is so much in the way of hope to show his children in his love letters that he has written to them. And next time, on the Hopeful Perspective podcast, we will pick back up our series Jars of Clay podcast. We will pick back up our series Jars of Clay. So I am looking forward to being with you next time as we meet together on the Hopeful Perspective.
Speaker 1:Until then, I want to thank you for joining me along this journey, allowing me to share from my heart today and, if you would be so kind to follow, subscribe and, most importantly, to rate and write a review for others on your platform who may need the hopeful perspective in their life. Did you know that you can contribute monetarily by pressing our support the show link that is embedded on your platform in the episode descriptions, if you believe in what we do, I would cherish your prayers as well as considering giving to our cause we do. I would cherish your prayers as well as considering giving to our cause. I want to shout out my gratitude to the multiple new donors who already have made this commitment to support the podcast financially. Without you, it would not be possible to reach as many people with the messages that we do or anyone who needs to be reminded that hope is real. So thank you so much in advance and until next time, remember you are loved.
